People are always emphasizing the importance of moderation. “Don’t go out too much,” they say. “Don’t watch too much TV.” But as we know by now, moderation is not my strong-suit, nor do I find it remotely interesting. And if there is one thing I love more than drinking too much, it’s television.
I’ve spent a good chunk of the last few days absorbed in Gossip Girl, which recently became available on Netflix instant. My interest came as somewhat of a surprise, since the show’s debut at the end of my high school years made me nauseous at the time, but having rated over 1000 movies on Netflix (a number which I am sure qualifies me for at least one rehabilitation program) and being physically addicted to the sexual tension that drives television drama, I decided to give it a shot. Immediately, as I should have guessed, I became enamored with all those rich, beautiful, disgusting people, the places in New York I will never go, that Brooklyn loft I won’t be able to afford, Blake Lively’s speech impediment, and Penn Badgley’s existence (which I subsisted on for the entirety of last Spring by re-watching Easy A over…and over…and over. What, it’s well written).
Even Joe was almost moved to tears during the Christmas episode in Season 1 where Serena gives Dan the gift of fake snow in his dad’s art gallery.
Okay, so maybe being obsessed with Gossip Girl, which is kind of a silly show, when i’m kind of an adult, isn’t anything to be particularly proud of. But I find the drama, in all its tackiness, pretty fulfilling. Plus, now I know who Taylor Momsen is.
The only other thing I love as much as television and partying (besides cats and sex and leather boots) is food.
Every so often, between episodes, hangovers and minimum-wage job shifts, I’ll get motivated to do something entirely domestic, like organize my closet or cook a delicious meal. Monday night, the choice was to make green bean casserole for a pre-thanksgiving potluck with friends. It’s not a particularly painstaking preparation. you basically just dump four cans of things into one dish, stir, and bake. BUT I will say that i have been making this simple thanksgiving dish every year my entire life, and have a few tricks up my sleeve to perfect the recipe.
That being said,
no matter what you do to it,
green bean casserole is one of the most delicious foods ON THE PLANET.
Here’s a blingee I made of it to demonstrate:
^That cat dancing in the bottom right corner is supposed to represent me, doing my happy-as-fuck dance, because I am about to eat the living shit out of that entire thing, probably including the pyrex.
or at least I thought I was.
It had just finished cooling, and we were just about to load it in the car when we (I say “we” but it was really “Joe”) set it on the ledge of the front porch where it immediately toppled to the brick steps and became a pile of mush and ceramic.
I nearly cried. Not because I had worked so hard making it. Not because the dish that broke was handmade by my aunt in the 70s. But because I was so. fucking. hungry.
It all worked out in the end, for the most part. There was an ample supply of homemade squash casserole at the potluck, and people gave me beer. Of course, I still get a gleam in my eye when I think about those french fried onions. But then I remember that Thanksgiving is tomorrow, and in just a few hours I’ll get to fill my very own horse trough with an array of casseroles, curl up in my bed, and watch as much Gossip Girl as I damn well please.
